Coffee, Chaos and Cuss Words

Many use this time of the year to debate the true cultural and historical facts of the day, get a ridiculous jump on their Christmas shopping, prepare for the invasion of friends and relatives, or clear out the supermarkets in the attempt to cook the ultimate holiday meal. This dark part of the year has a hold on me and I am still in a period of deep self-reflection mingled with grief. Knowing that this melancholy around my heart needs assistance to dissipate, I asked the Gods to send me the inspiration that would help move me forward out of the gloom. The answer that came was simple: create a Gratitude List . Gratitude Lists are not limited to the Thanksgiving holiday. I first started using them when I was actively attending Al-Anon meetings. While I have not been to a meeting in almost 20 years, I have used them many times to get me unstuck when Life saw me dancing in a quagmire. As life changes, so do the lists. At different times of the year, I may need to reflect on different thin...

Here is where I find myself; not in 'limbo', not in apathy or avoidance, but in the long, dark tunnel leading from the past to my next destination. Doors have closed, by choice and by chance, and I now seek the next door leading to my new path. I am truly excited about what the future now holds, but first, it requires some  raising of the anchors and letting go of past before moving on to the future. Some periods of transition are shorter than others. For some, once a decision is made or an action taken, the movement and consequences are felt immediately, like a strong gust of wind. In other situations (like my own) the progress is slow and feels uncertain that-even with glimpses of light- we will ever make it to the end of the proverbial tunnel. I am in a period of transition with what technically can be defined as my 'family'. As I gather my strength to me to complete some of the final acts as executrix, I find the energy within fluctuates. Emotionally I am burdened w...

Being the executrix for my parent's estate has been like an endurance trial with a moving finish line. Never, at any point of this ordeal has this felt like it has gotten easier. The reason is my because my crazy siblings have a knack for creating chaos just when it seems I'm handling things well. At those brief moments when I think I am able to see the light at the end of the tunnel....*WHAM*!! Nope, just the headlights of another sibling truck making a delivery from Crazytown... It's the manipulation that gets me the most. My brother has been downright abusive in his quest to rule the world  get his 'inheritance'. Despite frequent reassurances from me that I'm doing what I can to settle all the business of the estate, he insists I do more and get him cash faster. At times he has relayed his wishes with extreme profanity and verbal abuse...other times with selective memory and invitations to Thanksgiving dinner. My older half-sister has just gone along with hi...

Our spirit guests have gone back home. Those spirits who came for our yearly Samhain and Dia de los Muertos gatherings have left us with a whisper and a smile as the Veil has drawn back between our worlds again for another year. We are now in November and there is both a New Moon and a Hybrid Solar Eclipse on November 3, 2013. There are many ways one can call upon or harness the immense energy at play today. I am still reeling from the psychic effects of two major holidays which just passed.  But the New Moon or Dark Moon is a time looked at differently by many magickal practitioners for what kinds of workings they want to do. For me, the Dark Moon is a time for the last bit of spiritual house cleaning. I have spent much time in the past month (especially during this period of Mercury Retrograde) reflecting on what I want for myself and what I would like to develop in the coming days. At the Dark Moon I go deeper still and am completely honest with myself about what has been proble...