Stop, Look and Listen! A guide to walking the Witches path...Pt. 3

I first discovered the book “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron around 2002.(I highly recommend it to EVERYONE!) I’d heard of others working through creative blocks through this 12-week journey. At the time, I felt stuck and utterly bored with myself. My life was busy and chaotic but it felt empty and definitely not fulfilling. I decided to commit to this workbook to give me some insight on what I could change. Around week 4, there was a ‘reading deprivation’ challenge. Yes, one complete week with no reading at all. That eventually meant not only no books or magazines but it also meant no distractions including the television or the internet. (I can hear the gasps of horror already!) I will admit that it took me several tries to actually get through one full week without cheating and running back to my TV shows! However, what I learned about myself has stayed as one of the most powerful lessons I’ve ever learned. By removing the ‘white noise’ of my life, I learned how to ‘tune in’ and listen to the world around me, as well as within me.

I was filled with a restless anxiety…like an addict going through withdrawal. I went for walks, cleaned my house, watched people in my neighborhood, went for drives, and did a great deal of window shopping in town. At night, with no background noise or mindless surfing, I was forced to sit quietly or busy myself with some long neglected task. I tried to meditate, but that only turned into brief naps. I felt frustrated, because I felt I must not be doing it right or I would feel ‘better’. I still expected the lightening to come with the mystical knowledge I was lacking. But there was no thunderclap, only a whisper. Because I had finally tuned out all the external noise, at last I heard a whisper deep in my heart. Just a word…just a feeling, but I recognized it….I heard it and knew that was what I was seeking.  How did I never hear that before? Was Goddess speaking to me all the time and I just never heard Her? (I will not say what it was I heard, because that was what ‘I’ needed to hear. What ‘you’ need to hear may be something entirely different.)

At that time I was just utterly confused. Couldn’t the Goddess simply make Herself heard over any other sounds? Of course, but the problem was never Her…only me. My head and heart were so full of junk, that I couldn’t possibly hear any words of wisdom, guidance or love that were coming to me. I was so stuck in the rut of my own making and complaining about it, that I didn’t realize the way out of it was simply to turn the volume down. It worked, not just because I cut out the excess noise in my life, but because I made a choice. I wanted to make a deeper connection and hear the Goddess….but until I made myself willing to face the music of my own chaotic thoughts and feelings, it wouldn’t happen at all. To ‘receive’ we must make room for what is to come. Open our hearts, open our minds, and let go of the clutter that keeps us stuck and away from the messages that will guide and sustain us.

It can be a scary time. Many of us are not really comfortable in our own skin, so doing inner work is a frightening place to be. You feel vulnerable and often there are many powerful and negative emotions that have been stuffed down for a very long time. Like shaking a soda bottle, pressure increases…but, if you want to fill the bottle with something else, you have to release pressure and let it go. How do we do this in ourselves? Well, as much as I hate housekeeping, I cleaned. I would think on the powerful thoughts that I had kept down and wanted to release while scrubbing the tub or toilet (They have never looked as good since. Maybe I need to work on that a bit more? Hm…). I also wrote in a journal…pages and pages of free form, nonsensical writing just to dump what was in my heart and head somewhere else. You can clean, create, dance, exercise, sing…whatever works for you. Consider it spring cleaning for your head and heart.

To truly listen and receive the messages for my spirit I had to make room and I can’t say that enough. To be willing to receive a guest, you must make room at the table. To be willing to listen and hear the grace and wisdom of the Goddess, your inner voice, or whatever you believe in….you must make room within yourself. It takes practice, honest self-reflection and a willing heart. It is a practice that will become a part of your entire life, and that practice may change as you grow older and your life changes. The reward of learning to listen, above all, is inner peace. Oh yes, even for just a moment, you hear…you understand…and you feel peace in your spirit like raindrops on the desert floor. It is beautiful, joyful, and it will stay with you. I am not perfect at this practice even now. But when my heart is troubled, I feel stressed, I lack direction or I need comfort, I know what to do. I get still...I get quiet….and I ‘listen’….