Grown-up spaces; Adult-Only places

Why can't we have Adult-only spaces? Why does everything have to be 'family friendly'? What happened to the days when children had to grow up, learn the rules of proper behavior at home and THEN were brought out into the world? Seems to me that the problem is (as usual) not the kids, but the parents. Parents, desperately afraid they are going to miss out on a LIFE since they've had children, suddenly are up-in-arms whenever someone suggests any kind of adults-only space. There seems to be a ridiculous backlash whenever a restaurant, movie theater, or other business try to set aside a place for adults to be with other adults SANS kids. Those parents feel entitled to run roughshod over everyone else's rights and protest that it isn't fair that  their little darlings can't be part of the club. The real issue is why THEY can't be part of the club. These parents are free to frequent any of these establishments, just NOT with their kids in tow. Have we really dismissed the standards that some privileges are and should be, just for ADULTS?

Starting when we were very young, we were told that there were rooms in the house that we children didn't get to go into and mess up. Some friends of mine recall a front room (or living room) area  that was off limits unless they were having guests. In my house, it was Mom and Dad's bedroom. We kids had free run over the rest of the house, but not those areas....at least, not until we were 'more grown up'. It was something we aspired to...that one day we would be able to go in those rooms with the rest of the grown ups. Like sitting at the adult table at Thanksgiving, it was a sign that we had come of age and were taking our proper place in a new world. What a proud moment that was.  It was a milestone and really meant something to us as we grew up. Now? I've seen photos of Turkey day at friends homes where there is a high chair at the head of the table and the kids are throwing the green bean casserole at their parents because they 'only' eat chicken fingers....

When I moved to South Jersey, there was a movie theater that was adults only...and I don't mean that they showed porn. It was a theater with about a dozen screens and showed everything from art house to documentaries to mainstream dramas. The seating was modern...they served REAL cappuccinos, and it was a lovely, relaxed, Grown up environment. I didn't have to share my space with a crying child. No one was kicking my seat in boredom. I didn't have to listen to a kid talking back to the screen or asking their parents a thousand questions about the movie. And I didn't have to listen to a parent ask their child at regular intervals if  they needed to go 'potty'. I had some delightful conversations with my companions BEFORE the movie and watched it in peace. Heaven....  Unfortunately, in a move to boost their profits, the movie theater started changing the rules. No kids allowed after 5pm. Then it was no kids under 16 allowed after 5pm. Then they sold the theater to a new owner and it was no longer a child-free space. I had to endure parents bringing their five year old child to rated R movies with tons of nudity and violence at a 10pm show. It's no wonder I stay home and watch movies online instead of going out anymore....

When I would go out to those 'family style' restaurants with my friends, I asked not to be seated near little children. I think at first, it was the common 'Lina hates kids' misconception about my Childfree status that made them giggle. But as I explained to many a pal, like a train wreck....I would not be able to tear my eyes away from the ignorant and benignly neglectful parents who just let their children misbehave. I don't know why it is that people across the room can hear a child screaming and yet the parent within arms reach, cannot. I don't want be where the child at the table next to me turns to stare at me eerily through my entire meal. Or endure kids tossing  toys, food or running back and forth about the restaurant like a whirling dervish while their parents enjoy an uninterrupted conversation. How in the world do parents think that when their child stands up in their seat and screams that it is acceptable to ignore it and not consider every other paying patron in the establishment??

Childfree travel is also under attack. I don't know many people who haven't had some sort of horror story about kids and travel. So, when frequent fliers were surveyed and came up with their Dream Airline, it doesn't surprise me that parents were in an uproar. They didn't like the idea of 'family friendly' flights that were designed to engage and entertain their children. Why? Well....misery loves company I guess. That and the fear (again!) of missing out on something good and the determination not to let being a parent interfere. Most fliers surveyed even said that they would even pay extra for their dream Childfree flights. Parents protested that it wasn't fair to pay more for things they want, too, that should be available to all fliers ... *sigh*

I want my Adult-only places back. I want a place that I can be me without wondering my saying 'Fuck' is going to get me the stink eye from a mom who probably says it more than me. Parents should be able to enjoy these spaces too....but only if there is someone babysitting Jr at home. I am also incredibly sick and tired of hearing you use your child's mental illness or behavioral disorder as an excuse why you will not address the behavior or just FUCKING LEAVE!!!  If your kid has a problem and can't handle being in certain public areas then take them HOME!! Oh, and btw-not every kid has Asperger's Syndrome/Autism and shame on YOU for trying to exploit the ones who do by making it seem like they all act like your out-of-control kid. Not every child of every age is ready to sit in a restaurant, play, movie theater, etc for several hours at a clip (especially when you KNOW they aren't doing it at home). There are some things, places, events that are worth the wait. In this day and age where information is immediate, food is fast and we thrive on instant gratification of all sorts.....enjoying privileges of adulthood come in their own time and should be held as a sacred rite. Don't demean what I have had to learn, endure, experience my entire life by forcing me to continue to live through someone's childhood everywhere I go!

As a responsible adult-voter-tax payer-citizen, I believe that it is the Right of adults to enjoy child-free spaces as well as it being a Privilege of adulthood. Just because a parent does not want to let their child prevent them from having access to certain places or events, does not mean that I need that choice inflicted on me! There are many other options-and a majority of the world is centered around the business of being 'family friendly'. Let me have MY places where I can just be me and enjoy things that I have worked hard for. Let me have quiet time, fun time, food time, play time....but on an adult level without having to always make it digestible for your kids.  Believe me, YOU need this and you want it, too. If some of you parents are feeling a little guilty for wanting something that doesn't involve your kids....get over it and yourselves. The rest of us have suffered enough with you trying to the turning the whole world into a gigantic fucking play date. Leave us alone....or just stay home. Because I am an adult and I've worked really hard for the privileges I want to enjoy and I have right to pursue my happiness the way I want. Kids are not invited...and neither are their bratty parents.